I was in a Supermarket. And, for the millionth time in my life here in KSA, I overheard the cashier ( an asian) talk to the worker( the guy that puts the stuff in the bags) and he was commenting on the way someone’s wife was walking. I have heard a number of different comments. Dirty comments. All kinds of whisperings. I had to shout REALLY loud at one Pakistani Baqala guy once when I was in High School. He did not know I could speak and understand Urdu better than him. A little boy came and bought Pepsi and gave him a Riyal. He looked at the boy and he says , in URDU : why did you not bring your mama today.. REST IS CENSORED. The kid just smiled and left. The Kid was an arab.
So I went to the counter and I asked him in Urdu. How would he have felt if someone ten times his size had said this to him when he was a little kid? Shocked, he started explaining that these kids are naughty and bla and bla!.. I told him to SHUT UP and explain to me how he could be SUCH a low life?.. He did.
I have seen lower level staff do and say the most perverted things about the most decent women. The Taxi drivers, the shop workers, the waiters.. you name it. Can we say they are ALL jerks? No.
When a man is deprived of his wife or of a woman for two years consistently ( not just physical love but love and care on all levels) , the animal inside him grows in strength. I call it animal because it stops to differentiate between prostitute, mother and sister. And , I mean deprived in EVERY way. Add to this the other varieties of issues and burdens he is blessed with. Same applies to a woman, but she can hardly become as shameless as a man can in desperation. Men become RUDE and FRUSTRATED and it SHOWS. NATURE. And, God had given many solutions to this – such as a WIFE! It is not only the physical thing that keeps men normal, it is the presence of a companion and a female they can rely on.
Caliph Omar once heard a woman saying poetry which basically meant that if she did not fear God, she would do Haram ( commit a sin). So, he asked some other women how long could a woman stay away from her husband ( I would suppose it applies to the men too, but I would think it is the maximum) – they said not more than 4 months. So, he made it a rule that every 4 months the soldiers, and people away from home , MUST return to be with their wives. The result of this , a better , decent and highly motivated force of men!
Now, my question is: The men working here as LABOR are not men? Don’t you think it is a HUGE injustice to keep them deprived of their women and then expect them to behave like decent married men? Or are we so naive that we think they do not look at our women with lust? Are we so naive that we think we are safe?
Why can’t they be allowed to bring their wives here? Can companies afford to send them every 4 months? They can be given the option of getting their wives here. If they choose not to, it is their problem then. Can’t we see the benefit in this? Financial benefit being one of them?
What is the BIG huge deal in this? Are we not following the Sharia here?
If all men here could have their women ( and they can) then the result would be amazing blessings and security in this society. Consider the behaviour of a driver whose wife is here. He drives your car and she cleans your home. What is wrong with that?
In Pakistan and in India, we had and have 100s of people working for us. My grandfather had a British Nanny in Lucknow as a child !We had brought workers from Africa 90 years or more ago and they stayed with us to date. One generation after the other. They had kids, they became Pakistanis and Indians and they are to this day loyal to us.
For this, I have made this rule for my employees : Get married, bring your wives here. If you are not married, I will GET you married.. but one wrong comment on ANY WOMAN and I find out – you are fired and reported and definitely in serious trouble.
I just hope the authorities agree with me on this. It is a matter of safety and security. A man whose wife is with him, is more cautious than a man who is deprived for two years and on his own… FOR SURE!